Luminous Darkness
When we try to live in solidarity with the pain of the world—and do not spend our lives running from necessary suffering—we will surely encounter various forms of “crucifixion.” Many say pain is merely physical discomfort, but suffering comes from our resistance to, denial of, and our sense of injustice or wrongness about that pain. This is the core meaning of suffering on one level or another, and we all learn it the hard way – resisting what is and fighting our current reality.
As others have said, pain is the rent we pay for being human, but suffering is to some degree optional. The cross was Jesus’s voluntary acceptance of undeserved suffering as an act of total solidarity with all the pain of the world. Deep reflection on this mystery can change your whole life. It seems there is an inherent negative energy or resistance from all of us, whenever we are invited to a more generous response. Yet this is the necessary dying that the soul must walk through to go higher, further, deeper, or longer. The saints called these dying’s “nights,” darkness, unknowing, doubt. This is when you grow—but “in secret.” Without darkness and struggle, we would not know where the growth needs to take place.
Our secular world has almost no spiritual skills to deal with this now, so we resort to addictions, and other distractions to get us through our pain and sufferings. For the addict and the alcoholic, the internal brokenness demands relief and they find it in drugs and alcohol. The answer they discover by developing a personal relationship with a God of their understanding provides a greater relief and it allows them to navigate the trials and low spots of life – both external and internal.
Only truly inspired souls choose to fully jump on board this ship of life and death. The rest of us waste our time blaming or playing the victim to our own advantage. Without the inner discipline of faith (“positive holding instead of projecting”) most lives end in negativity, blaming others, or deep cynicism—without even knowing it.
Adapted from Eager to Love: The Alternative Way of Francis of Assisi,
pp. 21-22
Gateway to Silence:
“Oh, night that joined Beloved with lover.” – John of the Cross
Dark Night of the Soul
The dark night descends on a soul only when all other things have failed. When you are no longer the best meditator in the class because and your meditation produces absolutely nothing. When prayer evaporates on your tongue and you have nothing left to say to God. When you are not even tempted to return to a life of worldly pleasure, because the world has proven empty, and yet taking another step through the void of the spiritual life feels futile because you are no good at it and it seems as if God has given up on you. You can scarcely conjure up your old passion for him. It has become clear that you are unable to do anything on your own to remedy your spiritual brokenness.
Let’s clear away some misconceptions about the Dark Night of the Soul. The first is that authentic spiritual growth requires monumental struggle and tragedy. Suffering is not something designed to test the spiritual elite; it simply arises from the circumstances of life. Nor does the dark night of the soul only occur once in a lifetime. It doesn’t only happen to holy people. And we must get rid of the idea that it is a bad thing.
“The dark night is a profoundly good thing. It is an ongoing spiritual process in which we are liberated from attachments and compulsions and empowered to live and love more freely. Sometimes this letting go of old ways is painful, occasionally even devastating. But this is not why the night is called ‘dark.’ The darkness of the night implies nothing sinister, only that the liberation takes place in hidden ways, beneath our knowledge and understanding. It happens mysteriously, in secret, and beyond our conscious control. For that reason, it can be disturbing or even scary, but in the end it always works to our benefit.”
Teresa of Avila and John of the Cross see the dark night of the soul is “the secret way in which God not only liberates us from our attachments and idolatries, but also brings us to the realization of our true nature. The night is the means by which we find our heart’s desire, our freedom for love.” Many addicts and alcoholics call themselves “grateful alcoholics and addicts” because their addiction finally brought them to their knees and a true surrender to God. Similarly, with the dark night of the soul: it enables us to give up control of our lives and to rest in the grace of the One Who Cares.
Many in recovery believe struggles are indicators that relapse is on the horizon if we don’t reign in the controls. This is erroneous if your intent is to grow in understanding and effectiveness in both the human and spiritual realms. Intent determines everything that unfolds in our lives. When struggles loom in my life, I ask God for clarity and understanding of why things are unfolding the way they are. I thank him for the lessons I am learning and if I harm others while struggling, I am quick to make things right. Struggle does not frighten me; on some level, it excites me because I know the Great Sculptor is using my personal struggles to hone, polish and refine my character, which deepens my experience in existence. So, don’t listen to conventional party-line AA/CA/HA, that says when you’re struggling you’re headed for a drink or drug. Surrender to what is and open your mind and heart to the inevitable growth at your finger tips. The key to all of this is authentic and transparent dialogue with closed-mouthed friends who will be your guiding light. We must verbalize our struggles with like-minded individuals. Holding everything in and living with the shadows makes a drink, a drug or the ultimate sacrifice our only source of relief. We must embrace our shadows to bring them into the Light.